It Has Been a Good Easter

I woke, drove to my parents house and ate home baked kolaches. We then went to TBC to celebrate Easter. The service started with a skit showing the joy of God as it is proclaimed in the Gospel. There were three players, a man as the voice of God, and two women who, at the start were frustrated with life. Of course, by the end (after finding the joy of God), they were ecstatic with praise and thanksgiving. While I will not deny that God gives this kind of joy, I have never really seen it with my own eyes. I find that for me, joy is much less ecstatic, and tends to come in glimpses. While this may seem less, to me it is much more. They are moments, random at best, when I truly see and feel the grace of God. They are not moments of overwhelming emotion, but are the times when God allows me to see, for only a moment, his Gospel in the flesh, it begins and ends with God.(Surprised by Joy by CS Lewis is a good read on this subject)

It has been a good Easter.

While my cynical tendencies still abound when I contemplate the current state of the church, I am learning that, even though I have problems with some aspects of some churches, that they do truly bring others closer to God. I still struggle with my cynicism, but that is something I just have to deal with.

It has been a good Easter.

After church, we met at my parents house for a family gathering. It was wonderful to see aunts, uncles, and cousins whom I had not seen in a while. Susanne and Brad were in from California, and though we did not have a chance to really catch up, it was great to see them. After a wonderful meal, the women played Hand and Foot in the kitchen, while the guys watch the Masters and played poker.

It has been a good Easter.

I packed up the leftovers from the dinner (a ridiculous amount, it was a sickening reminder of the abundance with which we have access), and headed to church. Aaron preached a great sermon about the resurrection. While I know it is a, if not the, tenet of our faith, I realize how little a reality it is to me. I cannot seem to grasp it, not out of awe, but I seem to have a problem of completing the movement from head to heart. Don't get me wrong, I don't minimize the resurrection, but feel as if I have not been able to digest it act in it's graspable fullness. God help me.

It has been a good Easter.

After church a group of people gathered at my house (as is usual) and we watched several episodes of Arrested Development. It was great. After (almost) everyone left, I picked up Irresistible Revolution by Shane Claiborne. It is an amazing book.

For the last little while, I have struggled with the tension of my understanding of the Gospel and placing that belief into action. My problem is that I love generally, but love is never general; the Gospel is never general: it operates in the realm of specifics; you, me, that person. My frustration is that I have this grand vision of what it is to live the Gospel. I was reading. Shane talks of when he was working with Mother Teresa in Calcutta, and how he was struck by her view of action. "We can do no great things, just small things with great love. It is not how much you do, but how much love you put into doing it." I am going to make this a motto. I will try to be okay with doing small things for God, instead of dreaming of the grand. I will take comfort in the fact that with the smallest act of love, I reflect the one Lover.

It has been a good Easter.